There follows a guest post by Nic Elliott, host of the Sounding Board podcast.
I decided to order some lateral flow tests now that anyone can request to be regularly tested.
My aim – a simple testing of household available items to see what the results would be. The results are crazy.
- 3 gave a negative result.
- 1 gave a void.
- But 3 out of the 7 tests gave a positive result.
I make that a false positive rate of 43%, or 50% if you remove the voided result from the sample.
First I tested water – that came up negative. Then some tea left in my teapot, also negative.
Then I decided to test my own saliva (but not a swab stuck anyone official). That was negative, and still no voided results in sight.
I decided at this point to get serious and brought out the Lee & Perrins. This did give a void result, so it was time to bring out the big guns.
Pepsi Max (other vegetable extract-based drinks are available) – positive for SARS-CoV-2!
Then milk – a very faint line, but still classed as a positive according my official NHS leaflet.
And finally, mango chutney, the third positive COVID-19 test result.
Obviously, I am not going to report these staggering results, but maybe I’m looking for a conspiracy in the wrong area… Maybe the real bombshell is that COVID-19 is being spread through cola, cow’s milk and curry condiments.
To join in with the discussion please make a donation to The Daily Sceptic.
Profanity and abuse will be removed and may lead to a permanent ban.
Magufuli with PCR, an Austrian MP in parliament with Cola, and so on.
Everyone with an IQ above 50 knows since 9 months that testing is a farce.
And all governments know it too.
I’m waiting for them to tell us that every morning we have to roll a die. If you get a six you have to isolate for 2 weeks
Never say die!
Missing ‘t’ after the last word?
The Garfield approach.
Shock horror if you use a test in a way its specifically not supposed to be used and add acid to it then there’s a reaction.
Thats why the instructions tell you what to do and not do…
So it’s a pretty shit indicator?
No, it simply means the test relies on the interaction between 2 different antibodies. There are substances which interfere with the binding between the antibodies so potentially giving a false negative and other substances which can cause the antibodies to bind to each other (or the blocking protein on the test matrix) in a non-specific way potentially giving a false positive result. Various interferents are tested and the test reagents configured to try to minimise the effect of common interferents. Step outside that though and you are in unknown territory.
It’s a bit of a nonsense to test tea and pepsi as the actual sample – the test is clearly not designed to test those samples but they may have to be considered as potential interferents and tested i.e. do positive patients give a false neg after drinking orange juice, do negative patients give a false positive after drinking coke?
The real issue here is people not understanding the limits of any test, let alone a LFIA, and those same people putting them into the hands of untrained users and expecting accurate results. It’s stupidly pathetic – so completely aligned with the government’s response to COVID from the get go
But it does raise questions about people testing themselves at home. Have a drink of pepsi – remember you’ve got to do your test etc. I don’t know precisely what the instructions are but I imagine most people won’t follow them to the letter.
I’d suggest the test should be ‘am I coughing and sneezing and feeling generally unwell – if so – and if you’re sure its not hayfever then best stay home til you feel better’. But that doesn’t line people’s pockets
Agreed – but you don’t provide junk to determine life choices.
haha -33 votes..
-53 now ho ho ho
Milk is barely acidic, if at all.
Shock! Horror! If you use a test in a way its specifically not supposed to be used (mass testing on the asymptomatic) you’ll be having your country locked down forever.
Twatt
I have the instructions on my phone as my wife has to do two every week as she works for the NHS. In the instructions, it basically says if it is positive result, it may be wrong and if it is negative it may be wrong. Class, you couldn’t make it up, people read this and just don’t get the scam of testing.
Ok I’ll try and explain this in little words so you understand. The point is NOT that people are not doing the test properly. It’s the fact that the test is so poor that it is easily contaminated. if that’s too difficult to understand, maybe this will help, the test is shite!
Both. I haven’t tried it but it looks as if it needs some dexterity which many people do not have.
Is it the sugar?
Pepsi Max doesn’t contain sugar.
PEPSI MAXMaximum taste. No sugar
INGREDIENTSCarbonated Water, Colour (Caramel E150d), Sweeteners (Aspartame, Acesulfame K), Acids (Phosphoric Acid, Citric Acid), Flavourings (Including Caffeine), Preservative (Potassium Sorbate). Contains a Source of Phenylalanine.
Mango chutney
IngredientsSugar, Mango (44%), Salt, Acidity Regulator (Acetic Acid), Spices (Paprika, Chilli Powder, Cardamom).
Allergy InformationMay contain peanuts and nuts.
milk is weakly acid
it would be interesting to test yourself after doing the things that make your saliva mildly acid
https://www.colgate.com/en-us/oral-health/threats-to-dental-health/do-you-know-your-saliva-ph-heres-why-its-important
maybe the LFT is just a pH indicator
pH of Pepsi Max® is 2.74 +/- 0.01
This is according to “J Am Dent Assoc. 2016 Apr; 147(4): 255–263”.
mango chutney PH < 4.6
https://nchfp.uga.edu/how/can_06/chutney_principles.html
milk pH goes from 6.5 to 5 over several days
https://www.arcjournals.org/pdfs/ijarps/v4-i12/1.pdf
not quite so acid so gives a weaker result. interestingly the LFT can be used to see if your milk is off
If the milk turns to cheese, you’re guilty.
Or it sinks…
I think we need more humour and satire to cope with this shit-show. Well done.
Now test yourself after drinking Pepsi and having a mango chutney sandwich
In all seriousness, please try this. A significant portion of our population lives on a staple of fast food and Pepsi Max.
LFTs go better with Coke.
Yes – but someone might spot the white powder on the test sample!
It all goes up your nose, same difference.
Wasn’t it a mango that tested positive in Tanzania which persuaded them to give up testing very early on, that and an engine block if I remember correctly ?
A papaya and a goat I think. That was for PCR though (undoubtedly set to the standard ludicrous CT levels), which is even more striking, as PCR test shouldn’t be affected by acidity etc.
It was reported as the fruit pawpaw as well as a goat:
https://www.reuters.com/article/us-health-coronavirus-tanzania-idUSKBN22F0KF
Look like we are going to have to isolate all bottles of Pepsi Max. Anyone who has come into contact with a bottle of Pepsi Max within the last 2 weeks must also have to isolate themselves.
funny and original, time to start writing a comedy with the amount of absurdities since March last year
Come on folks, let’s put an end to this nonsense. Get out and about – enjoy life! Sod Whitty, Johnson and co. What are you waiting for? Permission?
Surely the good folk of Lincolnshite can’t be the only ones rubbing their tests on cats’ bums and dog teeth? I don’t want to accuse the author of being behind the times, but I’m afraid this has been going on for a while. How anyone at Imperial has any actual grasp of the levels from their randomly selected addresses, is a mystery to me.
Don’t mess with the British. They WILL take the piss and if it gets them 10 days off work, all the better.
Does this mean 500k bottles of Pepsi Max will die or is it 4k/day?
So fatties get really ill with the virus and it’s found in sugary drinks. Mystery solved, health crisis over.
Ha ha! Great scientific conclusion – much better that the so-called ‘experts’
Thank you Victoria. I knew my D grade in A level physics would come in useful one day.
Probably a better grade than Prof Ferguson got…
Should have added a suitable emoji at the end! An obvious demonstration that it’s a crap idea to issue toys like that. It appears that, by default, all the results are virtually invalid.
“For example, 41% incorrectly stated that flu causes more deaths than COVID-19.”
Spanish Flu is still more deadly than SARS-CoV-2