Sometime last year, I was deeply alarmed to observe a full-blown black African witchdoctor, dressed in literal leopard-pelts and animal-tooth necklace, standing patiently in line at my town-centre branch of Greggs to buy himself a steak bake. I knew that the post-Blair, post-Boriswave flood of uncontrolled mass immigration into the nation had changed the demographics of my previously lily-white hometown radically, but not quite this radically. What next, Mayan blood-sacrifices taking place in the freezer aisles at Home & Bargain?
However, as I then walked past the nearby New Age shop and observed a sign outside advertising the presence of an “Authentic African Healer” for gullible crystal-loving customers to consult in-store that day, I realised to my profound relief he must have been nothing more than a novelty fortune-teller in fancy-dress, rather than Baron Samedi moving into the neighbourhood. He probably hailed from Wolverhampton, not Wakanda.
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