Jonny Smith, co-writer of the acclaimed lockdown musical Scotch Egg, got in touch after listening to the most recent episode of London Calling and hearing the title of the closing number come up in conversation. He thought the lyrics might amuse Daily Sceptic readers, and I agree – they’re very funny.
Scotch Egg, you may recall, is a new musical set in the future, looking back at the Government’s handling of the pandemic and starring Boris Johnson and a rapping Chris Whitty – it sounds hilarious fun.
Jonny writes:
I was catching up on the excellent London Calling podcast yesterday and chuckled at James’s comment: “Well, Tobes, you can’t be too careful, after all.” This happens to be the title of the final song in our show, Scotch Egg and I thought you might enjoy seeing the lyrics (below). The show has got some great reviews and a real buzz going. We are in talks with larger theatres – latest reviews and pics on website.
“You Can’t Be Too Careful” – from “Scotch Egg – the musical”
I haven’t crossed a single city street,
Not since April nineteen ninety-three
Coz statistics truly frighten me
You can’t be too careful after allGoing outside is quite a thriller
A country walk? I’d reconsider
Coz nature is a serial killer
And you can’t be too careful after allCHORUS
You can’t be too careful
You can’t be too careful
Oh you can’t be too careful after all, not at all
Oh you can’t be too careful
You can’t be too careful
You can’t be too careful after all
Mind the gap, watch your step, stay in bed, safety first, mind your head, walk this way, catch your sneeze, wash your handsWater’s clearly so dangerous
A lifejacket really is a total must
I wear mine while sitting on the bus
You can’t be too careful after allCHORUS
You can’t be too careful
You can’t be too careful
Oh you cant’ be too careful after all, not at all
Oh you can’t be too careful
You can’t be too careful
You can’t be too careful after all
Mind the gap, watch your step, stay in bed, safety first, mind your head, walk this way, catch your sneeze, wash your handsI wear a mask!
It’s a rigorous, effective thing,
Despite the fact it’s a quarter of a nappy
Tied up with a piece of string(grandly, portentously)
I’m avoiding all humanity
Especially all my friends and family
It’s for the good of all society
And you can’t be too careful after all!
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Talking of Whitless….
Kinda gone quiet…….
In a non-extradition country…..?
Walk (off) the plank(s)
Gilbert and Sullivan it ain’t. The clever and the catchy are things of the past. Sigh.
Kudos for trying, though.
“In matters psychological and messaging subliminal I am the very model of the Covid Marshal General” (exit Covid Marshal General stage left, followed by chorus of nurses and skateboarding policemen)
Where’s The Lord High Executioner when you need one, after a Trial by Jury of course.
You beat me to it, but that is a very high bar to set. Incomparably gifted duo.
Fauci Knew About Virus Lab Origin From Secret Teleconference, Pushed Alternate Narrative: Jeff Carlson and Hans Mahncke
https://www.theepochtimes.com/fauci-knew-about-virus-lab-origin-from-secret-teleconference-pushed-alternate-narrative-jeff-carlson-and-hans-mahncke_4249218.html?utm_source=uschinanoe&utm_campaign=uschina-2022-02-02&utm_medium=email&est=B%2B7Krl8CwGvgArOLWzPzbZ82A%2FUJXdUK6mReoLH00Mu3x7FUTTO%2BQrX7VcOQSg7TGSIK
By Katabella Roberts
We need far more people at all our events here
if we want the tyranny to end for good
Thursday 3rd February 5pm
Silent lighted walk behind one simple sign
“No More Lockdown”
Bring torches, candles and other lights
Meet Corner of High Street & Pound Lane
Marlow SL7 1NF
Stand in the Park Sundays 10am make friends, ignore the madness & keep sane
Wokingham Howard Palmer Gardens Cockpit Path car park Sturges Rd RG40 2HD
Henley Mills Meadows (at the bandstand) Henley-on-Thames RG9 1DS
Telegram Group
http://t.me/astandintheparkbracknell
Was the COVID Lab Leak Covered Up to Avoid a War?
This latest evidence suggesting that SARS-CoV-2 did indeed originate from the Wuhan lab raises other interesting questions, such as why Fauci and Collins immediately suppressed the theory. Did they fear then-president Trump might use the evidence to start a war with China?
https://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2022/02/03/genocidal-ramifications-covid-conspiracy.aspx?ui=1fb065e0c4152b58bd4ed94cf29c7cbfad40307fb723460ddabacd55f3c58b0c&sd=20210518&cid_source=dnl&cid_medium=email&cid_content=art1HL&cid=20220203_HL2&mid=DM1098263&rid=1397237558
The Genocidal Ramifications of the Criminal COVID Conspiracy
Analysis by Dr. Joseph Mercola
We need far more people at all our events here
if we want the tyranny to end for good
Thursday 3rd February 5pm
Silent lighted walk behind one simple sign
“No More Lockdown”
Bring torches, candles and other lights
Meet Corner of High Street & Pound Lane
Marlow SL7 1NF
Stand in the Park Sundays 10am make friends, ignore the madness & keep sane
Wokingham Howard Palmer Gardens Cockpit Path car park Sturges Rd RG40 2HD
Henley Mills Meadows (at the bandstand) Henley-on-Thames RG9 1DS
Telegram Group
http://t.me/astandintheparkbracknell
Really !!!
Nicola Sturgeon takes a saw to classroom doors in ‘crackpot’ DIY effort to stop Covid in schools (telegraph.co.uk)
Further proof that the lunatics are running the asylum.
Why not just take the doors off. Be cheaper.
With Westminster footing the bill, why would Krankie care?
This was on GB News last night – 2000 doors to be sawed – is the aim now to freeze kids to death in the classroom if they can’t jab them
Seriously????
Last time I was in Glasgow the biting wind would have shorn a body in two. This is nothing short of child cruelty. Where is Save the Children?
No remotely humourous non of it is.Lets call the Holohoax part Deux on Ice and have released in time for Xmas day just after Billy Smarts circus and the Lizards speech.
Well Will you started it – so here is an alternative offering from north of Hadrian’s Wall.
BA BA
Resist defy do not comply
With the new world order,
They demand your soul complete control
With no regard for border;
Hung out to dry you must comply
With being marked and jabbed and muzzled,
If you object to this project
You leave your masters puzzled.
Rules for thee but not for me
Says Soros Gates and Schwab,
You’ll own nothing and be happy
With the green new dealing blob;
Build back better made you a debtor
As fiat pennies fall from heaven,
Watch the old succumb to cold
As he clock ticks past eleven.
Stay at home is a palindrome
For the bought and paid for media,
You will not find an enquiring mind
Without a case of anaphia;
The poor old sheep are all asleep
As the wolves disguised as shepherds,
Herd them into shearing sheds
Where the unjabbed are now lepers.